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    How to Navigate Challenging Life Transitions

    May 28, 2021

    When we’re young, life transitions are fun and empowering. We go from crawling to walking, walking to running. We start with training wheels but soon no longer need them. As we age we graduate into higher grades and become more independent. But as adults, life transitions can feel not so fun and far from empowering, […]

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    How to Navigate Challenging Life Transitions

    May 28, 2021

    When we’re young, life transitions are fun and empowering. We go from crawling to walking, walking to running. We start with training wheels but soon no longer need them. As we age we graduate into higher grades and become more independent.

    But as adults, life transitions can feel not so fun and far from empowering, because life transitions can often include loss: loss of a job, a marriage, and loved ones. During these life transitions, we can feel out to sea, completely at the mercy of the tides that seem to be tossing our lifeboat around.

    If you are feeling stressed and overwhelmed right now because you are facing one or more life transitions, here are some ways you can navigate these choppy waters:

    Slow Down

    Have you noticed that the pace of life has picked up? Most likely your heartbeat and breathing have also picked up as a response. It’s time to slow down.

    As simple as it may sound, slow, deep breaths are a powerful way to tell your body that everything is okay. Right now, your body is in “fight or flight mode,” as you subconsciously, and maybe even consciously, feel you are being attacked. Making time each day to be still, away from the noise and chaos to breathe deeply and slowly, will slow down your heart rate and make you feel calm and peaceful.

    Embrace Uncertainty

    I know, it seems completely counterintuitive if not downright impossible. But when we surrender control and embrace the unknown, with an almost scientific curiosity about outcomes, we feel positive emotions (curiosity, wonder) instead of negative emotions (lost, out of control).

    Acknowledge the Cycles of Life

    Someone once said, “This too shall pass.” Life, like weather, has seasons. While you may feel stuck right now and like nothing is going the way you hoped or planned, recognize the truth, which is, this too shall pass. Transitions are just that, an uncomfortable bridge from one part of life to the next.

    Fall Back on Traditions

    Rites of passage have been used for thousands of years in all cultures to help people transition from one place in life to another. It’s time to call upon this ancient wisdom of our ancestors and empower ourselves.

    Rites of passage put us in the driver’s seat. We can acknowledge that things MUST change because we intuitively understand that the human journey is all about facing challenges and becoming new versions of ourselves.

    Life, such as it is, throws us curve balls and sadness and things that cast fear and doubt into our vision. This is natural and no one escapes.

    But there ARE ways to navigate these challenges. Try these three tips. And if you’d like additional help along your journey, please get in touch with me.

    SOURCES:

    • https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201703/10-ways-make-it-through-your-life-s-transitions
    • https://chopra.com/articles/9-ways-to-navigate-loss-change-and-transition
    • https://duckduckgo.com/?q=rites+of+passage+modality+for+life+challenges&atb=v142-1&ia=web&iai=r1-1&page=1&sexp=%7B%22biaexp%22%3A%22b%22%2C%22msvrtexp%22%3A%22b%22%7D

    Filed Under: General, Telehealth

    Tips for Staying Healthy While Working from Home

    April 17, 2021

    For some people, working from home is a normal routine. This is, after all, the gig economy, and many people have been freelancing, making a living from their home office for many years now. But for others, working from home is a completely new phenomenon brought about by the global pandemic. For this second group […]

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    Tips for Staying Healthy While Working from Home

    April 17, 2021

    For some people, working from home is a normal routine. This is, after all, the gig economy, and many people have been freelancing, making a living from their home office for many years now. But for others, working from home is a completely new phenomenon brought about by the global pandemic.

    For this second group of people, working from home has completely changed their day-to-day lives, and many have found their overall health has taken a toll. With lockdowns and social distancing still mandated in many areas of the country, it’s a good idea to discuss some things you can do to stay healthy while you continue to work from home:

    Keep Your Routine

    We’ve all heard the stories of people admitting they aren’t showering as often and are staying in their PJs all day. While this was fun and novel at the beginning of the pandemic, allowing this to continue can negatively impact your mental and physical health.

    It’s important to keep a daily routine. This means setting an alarm, showering, dressing, etc.

    Get Exercise

    You may not even realize how much more you used to move around at your office or place of work. The office kitchen and bathroom were probably farther away, and you took breaks just to chat with coworkers. It’s important that you get up from time to time and move around at home as well.

    Stock Up on Healthy Food

    It will be FAR TOO EASY to put on weight when working from home unless you make sure to get rid of most junk food and instead, stock up on healthy food and snacks.

    Stay Connected

    Not everyone is cut out for working from home as it can be isolating. If you’re used to being around a lot of people and are feeling lonely, be sure to check in with friends and coworkers throughout the day.

    None of us really know when life will return to normal. If you are forced to work from home at this time, be sure to follow these tips so you can stay healthy!

     

    SOURCES:

    • https://www.hackensackmeridianhealth.org/HealthU/2020/03/23/8-healthy-habits-for-working-from-home/
    • https://www.everydayhealth.com/healthy-living/your-work-from-home-survival-guide-for-self-care/
    • https://www.forbes.com/sites/briannawiest/2020/05/11/how-to-maintain-your-mental-health-while-working-from-home/?sh=6fbc8f0e4de2

    Filed Under: Nutrition, Sports / Exercise, Telehealth

    Does Online Couple’s Therapy Work?

    November 10, 2020

    The current global pandemic has caused most people in this country to have to shelter in place for many months. This has caused a lot of stress and strain for families and couples. And, often acute or sudden stress can bring underlying relationship issues to the surface. But, since many states are still in lockdown […]

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    Does Online Couple’s Therapy Work?

    November 10, 2020

    The current global pandemic has caused most people in this country to have to shelter in place for many months. This has caused a lot of stress and strain for families and couples. And, often acute or sudden stress can bring underlying relationship issues to the surface.

    But, since many states are still in lockdown mode and residents are still practicing social distancing, how can couples facing these issues get the help they need? Through online therapy.

    What is Online Couple’s Therapy?

    Online couples therapy offers the same benefits as face-to-face therapy, with the added convenience and privacy of getting the help and support you need at home. Usually, sessions are held via video chat and with the couple in the same location. However, online couples therapy can be particularly beneficial for those couples who are dealing with the stress of living apart because of long-term hospitalization or military deployment.

    Besides the lockdown or being apart from your spouse, what are some other reasons couples may choose to try online therapy as opposed to face-to-face therapy?

    • It’s easier for those couples with busy schedules
    • Convenient for those couples living in geographically isolated areas (rural America as opposed to big cities)
    • Some people find going out into public or driving stressful
    • Couples may not want to be seen by anyone in their local community walking into a therapist’s office
    • When one or both partners has a disability that makes attending in-person therapy more challenging

    Online therapy follows a similar model to traditional therapy and in most cases, therapists do nearly everything online that they do in person. The only real difference is that it may take a little bit longer to get comfortable with each other, as human beings tend to connect more when they are in each other’s physical space. But once the connection has been made and everyone feels comfortable, there is no real difference in how sessions are conducted.

    When Online Couples Therapy is Not a Good Idea

    While online couples therapy can be very effective and beneficial to a majority of couples, there are those situations when it would not be suitable. For instance, in the case of domestic violence. Couples therapy, whether online or over the internet, treats both partners as equal in the relationships and aims to save the marriage. But when there are abuse and violence, the partners are not equal (ie, partners are not contributing equally to the problems) and the goal should not be to keep a victim in a dangerous relationship.

    Some other instances where online therapy may not be suitable:

    • If the couple has outdated technology and/or can’t access the internet
    • One or both partners distrusts technology or feels anxious about sharing over the internet
    • One or both partners feels uncomfortable having sessions in the home and would prefer a more professional setting

    Again, for a majority of couples, online therapy can be very beneficial and even preferred. If you’d like to explore treatment options and do so online, please reach out to me. I’d be happy to discuss how I may be able to help.

     

    SOURCES:

    • https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/how-does-online-couples-therapy-work
    • https://tacomachristiancounseling.com/articles/does-online-couples-therapy-work
    • https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201203/5-principles-effective-couples-therapy

    Filed Under: Couples/Marriage, Telehealth



    22996 El Toro Road, Suite 107 Lake Forest, CA 92630

    (949) 235-5104 chris@drchriscounseling.com

    Contact Today

    Christine Lillja, Psy.D. Licensed Clinical Psychologist and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
    chris@drchriscounseling.com | (949) 235-5104

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