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    22996 El Toro Road, Suite 107 | Lake Forest, CA 92630
    chris@drchriscounseling.com | (949) 235-5104

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    How to Emotionally Survive a Divorce

    December 1, 2024

    Divorce is often one of the most difficult experiences that a person can go through. In many cases, it requires you to leave your family home, lose contact with couple friends, and miss out on time with your children. And it almost always involves losing someone that you once loved, as well as the future […]

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    How to Emotionally Survive a Divorce

    Divorce is often one of the most difficult experiences that a person can go through. In many cases, it requires you to leave your family home, lose contact with couple friends, and miss out on time with your children. And it almost always involves losing someone that you once loved, as well as the future you had imagined having together.

    Despite how hard divorce can be, there are steps you can take to protect your mental and emotional health during this stage of your life. You may want to try:

    • Spending time with family and friends
    • Playing a new sport
    • Trying a new hobby
    • Volunteering in your community
    • Journaling
    • Meditating
    • Exercising
    • Spending time outdoors
    • Treating yourself to a massage
    • Attending support group meetings

    Divorce often causes people to feel anxious and depressed, so if you’re having a hard time coping, remind yourself that you’re not alone in feeling that way and that things will eventually get better. Give yourself a break while you recover from your divorce and adjust to your new way of life.

    Consider Speaking to a Therapist

    While leaning on your family and friends can often be very helpful following a divorce, sometimes it’s necessary to seek help from a professional. You’ll be glad to know that the therapists at our practice have extensive experience counseling patients going through the divorce process. We’ll draw on that background to provide you with the compassionate ear and personalized advice you need. Contact us today to schedule a consultation.

    Filed Under: divorce

    Is Depression a Disability?

    December 1, 2024

    In many cases, yes, depression can be considered a disability. According to Section 12102(1)(A) of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), a person can be disabled if they have “a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities.” Under this standard, depression will generally be considered a disability if it […]

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    Is Depression a Disability?

    In many cases, yes, depression can be considered a disability. According to Section 12102(1)(A) of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), a person can be disabled if they have “a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities.” Under this standard, depression will generally be considered a disability if it substantially affects a person’s daily life. This is determined on a case-by-case basis.

    Common Symptoms of Depression

    Depression symptoms can vary from one person to another but often include:

    • Feeling sad, empty, worthless, guilty, hopeless, anxious, restless, or irritable
    • Being tearful
    • Losing interest in activities once enjoyed
    • Having trouble sleeping or sleeping too much
    • Having a reduced appetite or increased food cravings (along with respective weight loss or gain)
    • Thinking, speaking, or moving more slowly
    • Having trouble focusing, making decisions, and remembering things
    • Having recurring thoughts of death

    When someone is in a depressive episode, they typically experience symptoms like these most of the day, almost every day. While some individuals only go through depression once, many people have numerous episodes throughout the course of their lives.

    Offering Help for Individuals With Depression

    If you’ve been diagnosed with depression or you’re experiencing the symptoms described above, we can help. Our therapists are highly experienced in treating depression and can provide you with the customized, compassionate care you deserve. Contact us today to get started—one of our knowledgeable team members will tell you more about our approach to treating depression, answer your questions, and arrange a time for you to attend an initial consultation.

    Filed Under: Depression

    12 Signs You Might Be Autistic

    November 3, 2024

    Have you ever wondered whether you could possibly be autistic? Autism spectrum disorder (often referred to as “autism”) is a neurological and developmental disorder that can impact how someone learns, communicates, behaves, and interacts with others. Autism symptoms can vary from one person to another and change over time, and only a trained professional can […]

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    12 Signs You Might Be Autistic

    Have you ever wondered whether you could possibly be autistic? Autism spectrum disorder (often referred to as “autism”) is a neurological and developmental disorder that can impact how someone learns, communicates, behaves, and interacts with others. Autism symptoms can vary from one person to another and change over time, and only a trained professional can accurately diagnose you with this disorder. With that said, here are 12 signs that you might be autistic:

    1. You follow the same routine every day and feel anxious if it changes.
    2. You make careful plans.
    3. You pay attention to small details and patterns that often go unnoticed.
    4. You find it difficult to explain what you’re feeling.
    5. You have trouble understanding what others are thinking or feeling.
    6. You take things literally (for example, you don’t understand what someone means when they use phrases like “keep your eye on the ball” or “you’ve got a frog in your throat”).
    7. You don’t pick up on sarcasm.
    8. The thought of socializing makes you feel anxious.
    9. You don’t understand social rules (for example, how you shouldn’t interrupt someone while they’re speaking).
    10. You find it hard to make eye contact with others.
    11. People have accused you of being blunt or rude even when you didn’t mean to be.
    12. You have trouble making friends.

    Speak to a Therapist Who Specializes in Treating Autism

    Do the signs and symptoms described above sound familiar? If so, we invite you to schedule a consultation with one of the experienced therapists at our practice. We specialize in treating patients with autism and we can supply you with customized advice about next steps to take. Contact us today and one of our friendly team members can tell you more about our practice, answer your questions, and schedule an appointment at a date and time that’s convenient for you.

    Filed Under: autism

    Rumination: What It Is & How to Stop Doing It

    November 3, 2024

    Rumination involves obsessively thinking about negative experiences and feelings. Some people replay events that occurred in the past, while others worry about situations that could potentially occur in the future. Rumination tends to have a snowball effect—certain mental health conditions (including generalized anxiety disorder and obsessive-compulsive disorder) can cause someone to ruminate, and rumination can […]

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    Rumination: What It Is & How to Stop Doing It

    Rumination involves obsessively thinking about negative experiences and feelings. Some people replay events that occurred in the past, while others worry about situations that could potentially occur in the future.

    Rumination tends to have a snowball effect—certain mental health conditions (including generalized anxiety disorder and obsessive-compulsive disorder) can cause someone to ruminate, and rumination can in turn worsen the symptoms of those conditions. Rumination often causes people to feel anxious, stressed, and depressed and makes it difficult for them to think, process their emotions, and sleep.

    How to Stop Ruminating

    Rumination often becomes more intense over time, so when you start experiencing negative thoughts, it’s important that you attempt to stop them from progressing. You may want to try:

    • Distracting yourself by exercising, doing chores, or calling a loved one
    • Moving to a new location (for example, taking a walk or visiting a coffee shop)
    • Meditating and practicing deep breathing exercises
    • Challenging the validity of your thoughts (for example, asking yourself whether there’s any proof supporting your worries)
    • Taking steps to actually resolve the problem that’s causing you to worry (for example, managing stress at home by creating a household to-do list)

    You should also pay attention to triggers that cause you to start ruminating and take steps to avoid them. For example, if you tend to ruminate late at night, try going to bed earlier or participating in an evening activity that will distract you from your thoughts. And when you do start to ruminate, acknowledge what’s occurring and remind yourself that it’s not healthy.

    Has Rumination Taken Over Your Life?

    If you’ve tried the strategies listed above but still find yourself ruminating, you may want to consider reaching out to a professional. The therapists on our team are highly experienced with rumination and can provide you with personalized advice designed to help you stop ruminating and start living a healthier, happier life. Contact us today to schedule an appointment at a date and time that fits into your schedule.

    Filed Under: ruminating

    3 Habits That Could Be Affecting Your Mental Health

    September 2, 2024

    Oftentimes, when we think about what could harm our mental health, our minds go to major life events—the loss of a job, the end of a relationship, or the death of a loved one. But small habits that often go unnoticed can also play a major role. Below are three common habits that could be […]

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    3 Habits That Could Be Affecting Your Mental Health

    Oftentimes, when we think about what could harm our mental health, our minds go to major life events—the loss of a job, the end of a relationship, or the death of a loved one. But small habits that often go unnoticed can also play a major role. Below are three common habits that could be negatively affecting your mental health:

    1. Not Getting Enough Sleep

    Sleep impacts your mental health in numerous ways—it can affect your cognitive skills, mood, and behavior. As such, failing to get enough sleep can increase your risk of anxiety and depression and make it more difficult for you to focus, solve problems, make decisions, remember things, and control your emotions and impulses. Try sticking to the same sleep schedule, keeping your bedroom cool and dark, and performing a relaxing activity before bed (e.g., taking a warm bath or reading).

    2. Being Inactive

    In today’s busy world, it can be difficult to find time to exercise, but it’s important to stay active. Not only can exercise improve your physical health, but it can also boost your mental health. In fact, studies have shown that regularly exercising could reduce your risk of depression.

    3. Scrolling Through Social Media

    Social media can be beneficial—it can help you stay connected to long-distance family and friends and keep up with current events—but research suggests that spending too much time on it can lead to anxiety and depression. To reduce your screen time, try setting a timer, turning off notifications, or deleting apps from your phone.

    Start Improving Your Mental Health

    In addition to breaking the negative habits described above, one of the best things you can do to boost your mental health is speak to a therapist. Fortunately, you can entrust your care to the skilled team at our practice. Once we’ve learned more about you and any issues you may be experiencing, we’ll be able to provide you with customized advice for how to eliminate negative habits from your life and start implementing more positive ones. Contact us today to schedule your first appointment.

    Filed Under: habits, mental health

    How to Track Your Mental Health

    August 7, 2024

    If you’re looking to improve your mental health and overall well-being, one of the best things you can do is track how you’re feeling. Not only does this allow you to identify any issues you might be experiencing and set goals for how to resolve them, but it can also help you analyze how you’re […]

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    How to Track Your Mental Health

    If you’re looking to improve your mental health and overall well-being, one of the best things you can do is track how you’re feeling. Not only does this allow you to identify any issues you might be experiencing and set goals for how to resolve them, but it can also help you analyze how you’re progressing toward those goals. Here are some tips for how to track your mental health:

    • Use the tracking method that will work best for you. For example, some people enjoy the ritual of writing in a paper journal, while others prefer the convenience offered by a digital app.
    • Schedule a time to track how you’re feeling each day. For example, you could do it after dinner or before bedtime. If you have trouble remembering to do it, you may want to set a reminder alarm.
    • Find a comfortable space that’s free of distractions.
    • If you find it difficult to explain how you’re feeling overall, try focusing on specific indicators like appetite, energy, mood, sleep, and stress.
    • Set SMART (specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-bound) goals. For example, rather than simply saying that you want to feel less anxious, say that you’ll spend 10 minutes meditating each morning for the next month.
    • Focus on one goal at a time. Otherwise, you may end up feeling overwhelmed, which could impede your progress.

    Take Control of Your Mental Health

    Once you’ve started tracking your mental health, you may find that you need a professional to help you achieve your goals. You’ll find exactly what you’re looking for at our practice. Our therapists are highly experienced and will supply you with the individualized, patient-focused care that we’ve come to be known for. Contact us today to request an appointment.

    Filed Under: mental health

    10 Affirmations to Add to Your Daily Routine

    July 5, 2024

    Words have power, and the way we talk to and about ourselves can have a significant impact on our thoughts and behaviors. That’s where affirmations come in—repeating certain phrases to yourself can boost your self-esteem, reduce your stress, create a more positive mindset, motivate you to take certain actions, and improve your overall well-being. So, […]

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    10 Affirmations to Add to Your Daily Routine

    Words have power, and the way we talk to and about ourselves can have a significant impact on our thoughts and behaviors. That’s where affirmations come in—repeating certain phrases to yourself can boost your self-esteem, reduce your stress, create a more positive mindset, motivate you to take certain actions, and improve your overall well-being.

    So, how can you start taking advantage of all the benefits that affirmations can offer? Begin by choosing the phrases that will best serve your needs. Here are 10 ideas:

    1. I deserve to be happy.
    2. I’m strong enough to get through this.
    3. My body is beautiful.
    4. I trust myself.
    5. I’m going to be alright.
    6. I can do whatever I put my mind to.
    7. I’m proud of myself.
    8. Today is going to be a great day.
    9. I’m worthy of love.
    10. I’m at peace with the things I can’t control.

    Once you’ve selected the affirmations you want to use, decide how you want to incorporate them into your routine—maybe you can say them as you’re getting ready in the morning, commuting to work, or winding down before bed. Many people find it helpful to recite their affirmations out loud, but you can also say them to yourself, if preferred. No matter what, it’s important that you repeat them daily, since doing so makes it easier for your brain to adapt and create new thinking habits.

    Ready to Start Incorporating Affirmations Into Your Life?

    If you’d like to learn more about affirmations and the effect they can have on your well-being, contact us today and request an initial consultation. Our therapists believe in the power of affirmations and can recommend some options that will serve your specific needs.

    Filed Under: daily routine

    3 Types of Boundaries

    June 14, 2024

    You may have heard about the benefits of setting boundaries with family, friends, and coworkers—by communicating your needs and wants, you can boost your self-esteem, prioritize your mental and emotional health, and improve your overall well-being. In the long run, boundaries can also enhance the relationships you have with those around you since they can […]

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    3 Types of Boundaries

    You may have heard about the benefits of setting boundaries with family, friends, and coworkers—by communicating your needs and wants, you can boost your self-esteem, prioritize your mental and emotional health, and improve your overall well-being. In the long run, boundaries can also enhance the relationships you have with those around you since they can help you feel respected instead of resentful. But did you know that there are numerous types of boundaries? Here are three of the most common:

    1. Physical boundaries – You communicate how you want to be touched and how much personal space you need. For example, you can let a colleague know that you’d rather shake hands instead of hugging or kissing. This doesn’t just apply to your body, either—you can also let your in-laws know that you don’t feel comfortable having them enter your bedroom while they’re babysitting.
    2. Material boundaries – You communicate when you’re willing to lend out money and possessions and how you want them to be treated. For instance, you can let a friend know that you can’t afford to lend them more than $100. Or, you can tell your son that he can only borrow your car if he returns it with a full tank of gas.
    3. Time boundaries – You communicate how you want to use your time. For example, you can tell your boss that you can’t stay past the end of your scheduled workday. Or, you can ask your spouse to refrain from calling and texting while you’re having dinner with friends except in case of an emergency.

    Start Setting Boundaries in Your Life

    If you need help implementing any of the boundaries described above, contact us today and ask to schedule a consultation with one of the skilled therapists on our team. We understand the many benefits that healthy boundaries can offer, and we’ll work with you to identify the steps you’ll need to take to set them in your life.

    Filed Under: boundaries

    How to Deal with Social Anxiety after COVID

    July 22, 2021

    It has been a very long year. Lockdowns and social distancing have had a profound impact on our hearts and minds. But thankfully, as the vaccines roll out and the country begins to slowly open back up, we are beginning to return to some kind of normal. While many people are jumping for joy with […]

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    How to Deal with Social Anxiety after COVID

    It has been a very long year. Lockdowns and social distancing have had a profound impact on our hearts and minds. But thankfully, as the vaccines roll out and the country begins to slowly open back up, we are beginning to return to some kind of normal.

    While many people are jumping for joy with the idea of taking part in normal social gatherings and getting back to life pre-pandemic, there are also those individuals who are feeling a bit of social anxiety at the same time. This is to be understood.

    Being social requires a set of skills. We learned as children how to interact with those around us. As we grew older, we learned even more of the intricate and complex social structures, rules, and more. Being away from society for a year or more has put a kink into these important skills for many of us. You may have learned how to ice skate as a kid, but if you haven’t been on skates for years, there’s a good chance you’ll break some bones!

    Here are some tips for dealing with any social anxiety you may be experiencing:

    Be Kind to Yourself

    Many will find it absolutely exhausting trying to relearn all of the social skills they haven’t practiced in some time. It’s okay, you’re not the only one who is struggling right now. Just be kind and gentle with yourself.

    Stick with Your Own Comfort Level

    Some people may be feeling anxiety right now because they are unsure of how safe it is to be out in the world. If we’re honest, the talking heads on TV seem to give us mixed signals about what is really going on. All you can do is set your own boundaries and determine what you feel comfortable with. If you’re not comfortable giving or receiving hugs, don’t feel pressured by someone else. Respect your own boundaries and comfort level and take things day by day.

    Take Things Nice and Easy

    If you haven’t worked out physically in some time, you wouldn’t, on your first day at the gym, run for an hour on the treadmill and THEN lift heavy weights afterward. You’d take things slow so as not to hurt yourself.

    Apply this same logic to your social life. If you feel out of shape socially, then take things slow. Don’t suddenly fill your social calendar with all kinds of activities and events. Start with a small gathering and go from there.

    Speak with Someone

    If you find your anxiety isn’t dissipating after some time, you may want to speak with a counselor. They can give you the tools to help you get out of your rut and back into a healthy and joyful life.

    If you’d like to speak with someone about your anxiety, please reach out to me.

    SOURCES:

    • https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-to-deal-with-social-anxiety-after-a-year-of-social-distancing/
    • https://www.bbc.com/news/newsbeat-56323453
    • https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/calmer-you/202007/12-powerful-ways-help-overcome-social-anxiety

    Filed Under: Anxiety

    Benefits of a Mental Health Day from Work or School

    July 22, 2021

    We’ve all had those days when the alarm goes off and we lie in bed, feeling depleted of our energy, and maybe even our good mood. We think to ourselves, “I’m not really sick, but I just need a break from real life today.” While taking a sick day is common when you are feeling […]

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    Benefits of a Mental Health Day from Work or School

    We’ve all had those days when the alarm goes off and we lie in bed, feeling depleted of our energy, and maybe even our good mood. We think to ourselves, “I’m not really sick, but I just need a break from real life today.” While taking a sick day is common when you are feeling physically unwell, what’s not as common – but perhaps should be – is taking a mental health day when you are feeling mentally and emotionally unwell.

    Now many, if not most, companies do offer their employees personal days with no questions asked. But many people save these days for what seems like real-life emergencies. They feel guilty if they use one of these days to simply rest and relax their mind.

    The truth is, taking a mental health day from work or school can be extremely important for your overall well-being. It can help you avoid burnout, improve your mood, help you get some much-needed rest, and rejuvenate you so you can tackle “real life” once again.

    Signs It’s Time for a Mental Health Day

    So how do you know when you are really in need of a mental health day and when you’re just feeling a bit lazy and unmotivated?

    Stress

    You’ve been feeling overwhelmed and irritable.

    You Just Feel… Off

    Sometimes we don’t feel like ourselves, but we can’t quite put our finger on what’s wrong. We know we feel anxious and like the world is a bit too much. This is a sure sign you need a break.

    Getting Sick More Often

    Are you dealing with a cold that “just won’t go away?” When we are stressed, our immune systems become compromised, and it’s harder for us to fight off the common cold.

    The bottom line is you should never feel guilty for taking some time for your mental health. I encourage you to take a mental health day every once in a while. Sometimes it’s the absolute best thing we can do for ourselves.

    And if you find a mental health day didn’t quite do the trick, you may have more going on in your life that requires more hands-on treatment. If you like the idea of speaking with someone about whatever is bothering you, please get in touch with me so we can discuss treatment options.

    SOURCES:

    • https://aaptiv.com/magazine/take-mental-health-day
    • https://health.clevelandclinic.org/is-taking-a-mental-health-day-actually-good-for-you/
    • https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/how-to-take-a-mental-health-day

    Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression, General

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    22996 El Toro Road, Suite 107 Lake Forest, CA 92630

    (949) 235-5104 chris@drchriscounseling.com

    Contact Today

    Christine Lillja, Psy.D. Licensed Clinical Psychologist and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
    chris@drchriscounseling.com | (949) 235-5104

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